Writing is a pain in the a**

FeaturedWriting is a pain in the a**

Salmon Rushdie says in his MasterClass “sit down and don’t stand up until you’ve written something”, but what if you can’t sit?
Or stand? Or really lie even?
Right now I’m battling tendonopathy, which is an obliquely intellectual way of saying there’s something wrong with my hamstring tendon but no one knows what.
And yep, it’s a real pain in the ass.
Like a young band trying to find their style, my hamstrings are right now pumping out a variety of different pain, or tunes, I guess you could call them.
Let’s call this band of tendons The Pain Merchants, and I imagine their first big hit would be “You’ve Really Done It Now”, a stabbing rock anthem pain that you’ll hear a lot for a few months and will be a real ear worm.
Then there’s Throbbing, the follow up single that’s a bit like a younger sibling, always trailing behind and staying around longer than anybody really wants.
Pulsar is the indie foray the band takes to “discover themselves” and only the die hard fans will know.
This tune is about being in that semi-comatose state before sleep, when you’re finally beginning to relax. Then the pain begins to radiate from the top of your leg, growing until it reaches sheet grabbing intensity before fading into nothing, almost like a pulsar star radiating light. The bonus B side is that it repeats at regular intervals, all for some scientific reason that’s not relevant at 3am.
One of my favourites is the newly released Crawling. It feels like a spider with knives for legs is slowly walking up (or down, it can go either way) your leg. When you walk, it walks, and when you stop, it stops, which would make for a funny Tiktok – if you weren’t actually clutching your leg.
And the last in The Pain Merchant’s top hits is Rubber Band, a song that’s so catchy it keeps coming back. The pain starts at some central point before stretching out until your leg feels tight, then, at the worst time, it snaps back into the central point again, leaving you breathless.
Like you’ve just spent the last hour in a mosh pit.
And this is just The Pain Merchants first album, but I’m ok to wait for their next album
Pity I can’t dance to them.

Or sit.

Or stand.

So Salman, if I sit down to write and can’t get back up again until I’ve written something, I guess all you’re going to get is this.
And swear words. A lot of swear words.

FWFFC 4 – Dialogue Challenge

FeaturedFWFFC 4 – Dialogue Challenge

Meeting Sophie

“Whachya doing?”  Sophie hovered over Ben, but his eyes never left the book in his hands.

“Reading.” 

“Ooooo, whadareya, 100 years or something?”  Sophie laughed, but when Ben didn’t answer or look up, she plopped herself on the couch beside him. 

“I read too ya know?”

“Uh-huh.”  He flicked a page over, smoothing the crease down.

“Yeah, mostly on my phone though.  It’s new, wanna see?”  She pulled it out of her sweatshirt and held it up.

Silence. He didn’t even look up.

“When Mum said she was buying a pink phone I thought it would look babyish, but it’s actually hot pink, plus it’s one of those new flip phones, it looks like one-a the toy ones, but it’s not, it’s not even fake or old or anything, it’s like the latest one you can get.  It opens with this hinge thing here, see – open close open close open – and it’s got a full screen and one of those UHthingy cameras, so my TikToks are real clear on it.”

She paused for a breath, and Ben lifted his eyes to see her watching him closely.

“Wachya reading?”

“A book about mutinies.”

“Is that like with pirates and stuff, cos we watched a movie about pirates last week, Dad said it was way old, but it was cool, there was one guy who walked weird, and Dad said he looked like someone had kicked him in the nuts, then Dad got up and staggered around the room holding his ya-know-what, it was soooo funny.” 

Ben nodded, but didn’t put his book down; it remained in his hand, his left thumb pointing to his spot in the book.

“The movie was cool, lots of running and jumping which is kinda funny cos it all takes place on a ship, well mostly a ship, there was stuff where they were in a town and some other stuff where they were on an island and that was weird cos there were two of that funny walking pirate, but then they were on the sea again and ships were being blown up and sinking.”

As Sophie stopped for a breath, Ben took his chance to speak, pushing his glasses to the top of his nose.

“Mutinies are stories about sailors who rebel against their captain.”

Sophie’s eyes widened.

“Oooooo, like Captain Bligh and the Bounty?”

“Yeah.”  Ben nodded, surprised.  “How do you know about that?”

“TikTok, of course.  They’ve got loads of cool stuff like that, where you learn what it was like back in the old days and how women used to wear long dresses and not be allowed to own anything and how people used to be slaves and everything was made out of wood.” 

Sophie swung her legs against the couch and flipped her phone open and closed, then flicked it open once more.

“Wanna watch one?”

Ben marked his place in his book and put it down. 

“Yeah, sure.”

Get and Stay Inspired

FeaturedGet and Stay Inspired

When I wrote the above title, I immediately thought of the training I’m doing with my dog. “Get it” is when he goes to fetch something and, of course, “Stay” is when I want him to remain in one place. And just like with my dog, I have mixed results when it comes to giving these commands to my inspiration.

So below are a few ideas, to “get” inspired and then to “stay” inspired.

“Show up, show up, show up, and after a while the muse shows up, too.” – Isabell Allende


Plant an Idea tree

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

These can be expensive and sometimes very difficult to grow, but plant it, water it and see what you get. My own was on sale because it was losing its leaves, and I think I should’ve planted it where it got full sun, but it still fruits ideas from time to time, and I don’t give it a lot of maintenance.

You do need good fertiliser for it though, and I’d thoroughly recommend…

Keep a notebook/journal

Use it or lose it is a good motto for almost everything in life, but it’s very important when it comes to creativity. It should be daily but it doesn’t have to be much; you could write for five minutes, think up a descriptive phrase or a piece of dialogue. Making notes and being creative on a daily basis, will keep you hungry for the writing process and might even make it a little fun. And maybe, like me, it’ll give you a shortcut into the writing flow (also known as Inspiration!). You never know, you might even get some Idea blossoms out of it…

Write some fast fiction

Stuck on a long piece of work that’s set harder than concrete in the Artic? Have your characters sloped off for a cigarette while you weren’t looking and now you can’t get them back to work? Or, are you between works and can’t face writing another long story?

Welcome to the fast fiction franchise!

Fast fiction is a great way to get your creative adrenaline running and keep you interested in writing stories and ideas. Give yourself an idea, a word and a time limit, and just go for it. Then watch a half ripened idea bloom into a tiny but delicious idea. And we all know that the smaller fruit is always packed full of flavour, right?

With my Four Weekly Fast Fiction Challenges, I’ve fruited some very different ideas, styles and stories. It’s kept me interested in writing while I’ve been pretending to ignore my novel, and it honestly feels like a jolt of adrenaline every time I do it. So I’d suggest you give it a go – in fact, if you want inspiration, here’s my FWFFC prompts.

Not satisfied with those? How about these!

No excuses now!

Read read read

Particularly books that are in a similar genre or style that you’re aiming for. Again, it’s about keeping your imagination awake and ready to write at any time, and you won’t even know you’re doing it, but your mind will be squirreling away ideas and themes for the tree.

Writing Groups and Courses

I like to think of these as the garden bed the Idea tree is planted in. I’ve harped on enough about this for you all to know what I’m going to write, but it’s not just about receiving feedback, but about being surrounded by people who understand the writing process and have the same passion for the written word. It’s the regular kick up the ass I need, both from the inspiring conversations we have and the time pressure of having to submit a piece every couple of months.

Even these series of blogs have been inspired by my group’s chats about their writing process, so I’m a firm believer that writing groups and classes are great fertiliser for the Idea tree.

Listen to the experts

I’m sure you’ve read enough quotes from other writers in this blog to know that I love to listen and read about other writers’ creative process. I find this quite an active exercise, because every idea they put forward I compare to my own process or ideas. It’s like I’m trying out another author’s Idea tree to see if I want to graft some of it to mine, and I’ve certainly added quite a few editing techniques to my arsenal from listening and reading to different authors.

And below is a quote, because you know I love them.

Always listen to experts. They’ll tell you what can’t be done, and why. Then do it.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

So that’s how to nurture your Idea tree, and train your inspiration to wee on it and make the ideas sweeter. Yes, I went there.

Good luck and let me know how you get and stay inspired!

A Cynic’s Guide to Writing

FeaturedA Cynic’s Guide to Writing

Let’s write a funny post, I said. Let’s put all the generic tips together in one post and mock them, I said.

Then I found this website, which did this but with serious intention, and my little artist’s heart broke a little.

I think about writers who always stick to their genre rules (and I’ve quoted some of them in this blog, so no judgement), but I think that makes books/film/tv boring. Apologies to anyone who’s a massive Marvel fan, but I can predict the storyline within the first 30 minutes. When a story comes along that blindsides you, like Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn, it’s a refreshing, fun and exhilarating read. It’s probably why I’m a massive David Lynch fan – you never know where he’s going to take you.

So here’s a tongue and cheek guide to writing books that are all true but a touch clinical (and cliched) for my liking.

Write fiction for women

Want to make buckets of money? Want to be fawned over at writers’ festivals and to constantly be writing autographs? Well, write for women and that will future will be a lot easier to attain. Women account for 80% of book purchases, so it makes sense to target these “gatekeepers of our culture” (Sharmaine Lovegrove, publisher).

Are you a man wanting to write a novel? Worried that you can’t write for the target market? No problem, according to this Guardian article, women don’t really care; they just want a good book.

When women stop reading, the novel will be dead.” – Ian McEwan

And the good news keeps coming, as women are most likely to attend writers’ festivals and hang on every word.

So, people, let’s get writing for those wonderful women out there who are spending their cash on the novel!

Write a genre novel

According to 2018 study, fiction sells double the books of non-fiction, and genre novels sell double what a “literary” novel will sell. In that year alone a whopping 1668 genre books making it onto the New York Times Bestsellers List, as opposed to 800 for the literary novel, so it’s clear we should all be on the genre gravy train.

But not just any genre novel, for not all genres are created equal. From a survey in 2015, mysteries, thrillers and crime novels made up half of the books Americans read, while only 25% of people read romance. Fantasy, science fiction and action/adventure all toddle along behind, and even in this day and age of the “sucking and fucking” novels aimed at women, horror is still the spotty kid no one wants to hang out with. That’s bad news for me, who does like to write wee ghosty stories in my spare time.

But, since I’m already committed to a fifth re-edit of the novel, maybe I could change the genre – give horror the flick and make the novel a thriller. And it wouldn’t be that hard, since my fictional city of Fulham is very hilly with lots of cliffs, which means there’s definitely potential to throw my main character off one of these every few chapters… Food for thought.

(As a side note, it should be mentioned that not everyone agrees with this genre order. Masterclass puts romance right up there, but it seems actual book sales tend to disagree.)

If you want to do your own research on bestsellers, the easiest way to do it is through the Kindle Store. Click here for a helpful guide on how to analyse the Kindle Store. There are also loads of sites that will do that for you at a price, so you can quickly compile data on your genre.

From science fiction to horror, it be male country

If you’ve got your heart set on writing science fiction or horror, then your target audience should be male. According to the Nielsen Book Research, men outstrip women in reading and book sales when it comes to fantasy, science fiction and horror, BUT (yet again bad news for me) they are less likely to buy a book written by a woman, despite the fact the horror genre being popularised by Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley with the publication of Frankenstein. (we’ll ignore all the other gothic novels that came before this tome shall we? Let’s call them mysteries…)

So, the take away from this is if you want your audience to be men, then be a man. That’s kind of sad, isn’t it? (maybe a few of them were tricked into thinking Twilight was a vampire story, like I was)

My solution: I’ve met a man called Moira. Wasn’t spelt quite the same way (Moeroa), but I could play that card and keep my name, and I certainly wouldn’t be the last. George Eliot, Michael Field and James Tiptree Jnr are just a few of the female writers who have gone before me.

Write short, easily digestible chapters with cliffhangers at the end

We all live busy lives these days, right? So make it easier on your reader and give them short, snappy chapters that will keep them on their toes. From Charles Dickens, who published a number of books in newspapers as serials, to Dean Koontz and Dan Brown, the short, sharp chapter with a twist at the end has made these authors incredibly successful.

So keep it short and snappy, and leave your reader on a….

Keep your titles short

Cliffhanger.

DaVinci Code. The Lost Symbol. Inferno. Angels & Demons.Dan Brown‘s the king of getting them as short as possible.

The Firm. The Client. The Pelican Brief. The Runaway Jury…. John Grisham likes his titles to have a The in them obviously.

Carrie. IT. Salem’s Lot. The StandStephen King’s books might be long (and unwieldy according to some critics), but his titles are generally succinct and to the point.

You get the idea. I don’t need to say anything more.

The End

So there you go, simple isn’t it? Now I expect every single one of you to be a bestseller in the next three months, otherwise I’ll be terribly disappointed.

And to those of you who write for the craft and for the artistry, I hear you. From my unpublished, submerged writer status, I hear you.

Peace out.

FWFFC 3 – And then I changed my mind…

FeaturedFWFFC 3 – And then I changed my mind…

Write a fast fiction using the words “And then I changed my mind”…. Yes, I cheated on this one!


Miles lifted his head from the line of coke on the table and pointed at Felix.

“That’s some high quality tread right there!” They both laughed, and Felix raised his glass.

“It definitely moves the needle!” 

Miles wiped his nose as he lay back in his chair, letting the product reach full effectiveness.  At the far end of the room and below a neon Dance scrawled on the wall, flailing limbs and torsos were momentarily exposed by swinging lights, and his own body responded, wanting to jitter and jive with the crowd.  His heart thumped loud in his chest, racing beyond its optimal and going for 110%.  He knew he’d have to parallel path for the next few hours to keep himself under control, but as he reached for his drink he saw that it was no longer marketable, just half melted ice cubes and sodden fruit left of it.   He raised his glass towards Felix, who was trying to gain leverage with the blonde from accounting.

“Another unit?” He mouthed, and Felix nodded.

He stood, and for a moment the world tipped a little to the right, but then it corrected trajectory, and he moved forward once more.

At the bar the beverage facilitators were moving with core competency, making hay as fast as they could, but their networks were overloaded, and Miles was pressed into a crowd four deep.  Above the bar a hologram woman dressed in a tight red dress, her legs tanned and thin and her breasts pressed up to her chin, smiled at him and lifted a bright orange drink.  She winked at him, before taking a sip, and on her sweet spot, between where her breasts ended and her legs began, Drink Chambolic for a Good Night Out appeared in the same bright orange as the drink.  She turned away and when she turned back she was Latino, all sparkles and gyrating hips, one hand held high carrying a bright red drink.  Miles was pushed further into the demand logjam, and he felt overwhelmed by the heat and the thumping marketing music.  His stomach began to circle back on his dinner, and sweat popped out on his skin.

That’s when he changed his mind and pivoted away from the bar, towards where he thought the evacuation cubicles were.  But his body was no longer a cohesive group of moving parts, and he brought his focus to bear on a bright green neon sign, sure it led in the right direction.  He pushed through the door underneath and gasped in cool, fresh air, suddenly blind and deaf.  It was only when the door clicked shut behind him that he realised he was outside the club, in a narrow alley. 

He’d really chummed up his night now.

Then a voice spoke out of the dark, and he felt a wave of disempowerment. 

“Looky here, it’s a Suit,” the voice said.

How do you get published?

FeaturedHow do you get published?

Do you know? I have no idea, I’ve never even had a short story published!

Thankfully I actually know someone who is the process of having her first collection of short stories published. Like by a publishing company. Like I’ve actually met her in person. I know. It’s like finding a unicorn.

Sally Franicevich, a long time short story publisher and emerging novelist, had this to say about the process:

“When a friend asked me for advice on how to get published I found it hard to think of what to say. I found it hard to think at all. I am in a period of my life I think of as my happy hiatus. A sort of drifty, boneless time.

Last year, I’d signed a contract with a publisher. My book was pretty much finished. The only work that still needed to be done to it needed to be done by someone else, someone who could spot the typos that I’d looked at already a hundred times and not been able to see.

So, my book was finished and accepted by a publisher but not  a single bad review had yet been written nor a word said of mockery or criticism. I had not even had to experience an absence of notice. My ignorance of tenses or what it meant to “split” a sentence – though not apparently how to split one – was only known to a few. I had received the encouragement of teacher and supervisor during my Masters year. Even my partner “liked” the stories she’d read and had found  – so far –  only a moderate number of typos.

A Happy Hiatus is not the best time to ask for a truthful account of what went before. All is calm, all is bright. Crucifixion is yet to come. However, even during an HH, some facts about me and my writing life do jump out.

One is, that I’m 63. People like me are the reason no one talks about “young”writers anymore when they mean “new”. Instead, they use the term “ emerging”. I’m a new writer but an old person.

There are some advantages to this. Young/new writers sometimes claim to find themselves short of material to write about. I’ve not personally actually known any young writers who claim this. The young writers I know – and I’m blessed to know a few – find material everywhere, but nevertheless, I’ve heard this claimed by some.

By contrast, when you are old, you have nothing but material. You are full of stories. You have stories up to your eyeballs. Stories fall out of you all over the place. Everything reminds you of something which reminds you of something else. Which reminds you of something you were told which simply beggars belief. Or buggars belief  as an ex-serviceman I knew used to say. Which reminds me that he also used to say: “ if I was any lower, you’d have to jack me up to bury me.” Which also reminds me of the time….

You see where I’m going with this.

Back to my experience of seeking publication. Email was the big thing for me. And discovering the range and diversity of overseas publications I could submit to.  When I found that I could –  very quietly and very privately –  send stories overseas to publications that published digitally, that was a breakthrough.

The first one I sent – this was in 2001 or so –  to a North American publication called Moondance, was accepted. The Editor wrote to me: keep on writing fiction! I love that Editor  – whoever she was – and always will.

It may have been my grandmother’s birthday or it may have been the anniversary of her death because that day I drove out to West Auckland after work and put flowers on her grave at Waikumete cemetery. I was very happy and wanted to share it and she was the only member of my family in town at that time.

I carried on carefully crafting and re-crafting (and re-crafting and re-crafting) a small cache of stories and searching out publications where they might be accepted. I particularly favoured submitting stories to competitions because of the long- listing and short-listing process. Competitions seemed to me to be kind of long-distance tutorial. Some of the Judges – the final judges, not the ones who laboured through the first cut – were fine writers whose opinion I very much valued.

I found these competitions by Googling “short story competitions”. Some websites have great big lists of them with all the closing dates set out for you.

 I kind of enjoyed the process of submitting to competitions. It was exciting. The other writers I was up against came from all the over the world. The competition deadlines gave me  hard goals to work towards, the chunky this must be done by this date structure helped me.

I hedged against disappointment by trying to always have something “out there” entered for some competition or another so after a failure, there was already something else to hope for; a sort of revolving cycle of effort and anticipation.

I had some success. I won one competition. I was shortlisted for another. But none of this meant I was published in the way most people mean when they say someone is “published”. What they mean is someone who has had  a book all of their own published and I hadn’t done that.

By the time I was 60 it seemed like I could afford to work part time for a while. I decided to look for part time work and enrol in a Masters of Creative Writing. Before then, my attitude to doing a writing Masters of Creative Writing was similar to my attitude to beautiful old villas in Herne Bay: bitter envy poorly masked by declarations of a more particular and finer taste.  I wouldn’t live there if you paid me! All those range rovers! Yuk! I quickly dropped all that when I realised I could actually afford to enrol in one, just as I would if someone gave me a villa.

My great good luck was being accepted into the right Masters Programme at the right time and – even luckier than that – being allocated by my wonderful teacher, an equally wonderful and generous supervisor.

My year of doing Masters was one of the best of my life. I worked hard on my thesis – a collection of short stories – and did well. But I didn’t win any prizes or anything like that. And when I read the work that did win the prizes in my year, I could see why they had won the prizes and I hadn’t.

I wasn’t at all down hearted. I was happy. My supervisor and my tutor had been very encouraging. I decided I would try a few different avenues for publication – the Laura Solomon Competition was one – and if those failed, I would simply self-publish.  I was fine with that prospect. I did want my work “ out there” but I didn’t much care in what form it got out or how. I had other things to write and I wanted to get on with them.

That’s another thing about being old.  While there are many things you still care as much about as you did when you were young, there are others that you don’t. I told to people I didn’t care how I got my collections “out there”, and I really didn’t. I was planning to put myself to a small  – but sensible –  amount of effort to interest traditional publishers but after that I would self-publish and get on with my next project.

My supervisor suggested I send my manuscript to her publisher. She promised to put in a “good word” with the fiction editor but was honest about the chances of success. There could be never be any guarantees, particularly with short stories.

But it worked. The editor liked my collection. The acquisitions’ committee agreed to publish them and that was that. I wrote a few more stories, checked for typos and began my Happy Hiatus.

Sally Franicevich

Besides delighting in Sally’s style, the most important point I take from Sally’s experience is that she put herself amongst other writers and, in particular, those that had been published. By knowing someone who had been published she was able to get her manuscript to the top of the pile at a publishing company and then get noticed, something that a lot of writers struggle with.

“Every creative success involves an element of luck, it also involves persistence.” – Dan Brown

Stephen King sent his novel to 80 publishers, J.K. Rowling sent hers to 11, and C.S.Lewis managed a staggering 800 rejections before his first novel was published. That’s persistence right there!

But it doesn’t have to be all hard graft – you can learn from other published authors on how they found their way into print.

Select the right people

You, as the aspiring writer, wondering how do I find an agent, how do I find the right publisher, how do I find the right people to work with, all you need to do is find a book that you love, a book that’s in the genre you’re writing and look at the acknowledgements. That’s a little treasure trove in every single book that tells you how to market your book.” – Dan Brown

This is great advice, one I plan on using when I get through the gazillionth rewrite and am ready to send it off. By making a list of agents and publishers who have authors of your genre on their books, I think you’re more likely to get traction. That was Stephen King’s idea, and eventually his persistence finally paid off. (In 1973 horror and fantasy genres weren’t considered profitable or noble, but, thanks to his success, you can really see that’s no longer the case whenever you walk into a book store)

How to write a query letter

If you want great advice on publishing, or at least getting noticed, then I’d suggest joining Masterclass just for James Patterson’s lessons. His advice is extremely practical and pragmatic, and will give you plenty of ideas on how to proceed.

This is what he says about getting an agent:

“If you can get an agent, it’s usually important, because the agent is the liaison between you and the publishers. And the agent, their reputation is based on their relationships with publishers and editors, so they’re not going to send out something they don’t believe in.” – James Patterson

And then for your query letter:

“Outline the letter. What are the bullet points? What do you want to accomplish with this letter? What are the selling points for your book? And then, what’s the perfect order for that? The first line, same with when you’re writing the book, it’s got to hook that editor or agent where they’re going, OK I’m hooked right from the get-go here.” – James Patterson

And while getting an agent isn’t the end of the hard graft, it’s a step closer to seeing your book published and available in local book store. As for what happens after that, find another writer. Me, I’m still working on getting my book ready to send out!

FWFFC Round 3 (ding ding!) notice

Wow where did those four weeks go?!? Dog walks, work and the beach just swallowed them whole, but tomorrow I”ll be releasing another fast fiction story idea, so remember:

350 words

1 week

1 idea

Good luck with hunting down those agents and publishers. They’re out there, hiding in plain sight!

Feedback

FeaturedFeedback

So…what do you think?

Do you like the title? What about the picture? And the opening line?

Yup, you guessed it, I’m asking you for feedback, because it’s essential to my writing process. It provides a fresh perspective that’s not coloured with years of writing (and rewriting) the story, hubris or self doubt. It lets you know what’s strong and what needs work.

As you may remember, waaay back in November I sent out my novel for feedback, and just before Christmas I received some from a couple of the readers. They loved the style and thought it flowed well, but just thought I needed to get on with the action a bit faster. That feedback is really no surprise, since getting bogged down in details is a common issue for me, but there were also some surprising positives. The fact they thought it was easy to read was a huge bonus. Having that feedback from someone who hadn’t seen a word until three months ago is the kick I need to keep going and finish the 5th (a 5th!) edit. I can’t wait for the hui (Te Reo for meeting), where all the readers want to do a deep dive and really thrash out their thoughts.

Which brings me to the point of the blog – Feedback, and who should you choose, and how to approach the feedback process.

Was the intro too long? Should I truncate that? Or do you like that I’m coming at it from a personal perspective?

Pick your target audience as your readers

I promise I did try, but I (kind of) failed at this. Amongst my writing group and friends I only know one or two people who are interested in the horror/fantasy genres, so I struggled to find the right people. But I did find three people willing to read my novel, and one was a regular reader of my genre, so I felt like that was a win. Then, luckily for me, one of my readers passed the book along to another horror/fantasy reader, and boom! we were in business.

So what lesson can you learn from this? None, probably! But my intention was to find the right reader for my book. That way the feedback would be more relevant to the genre I was aiming for, and the characters involved. From one avid horror read, I discovered the story was interesting, it just needed to get going faster and that the main character needed to be more interesting and active. They felt she was far too passive for what was happening to her.

Another reader works as a medical writer, and while this book wasn’t to her tastes, she very helpfully noted all the typos I’d made, saving me having to comb through my book in the next edit. Next time I think I’ll pay her to do this, because she seemed to find ones my brain swore were correct!

Set guidelines for feedback

Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man’s growth without destroying his roots.” – Frank A. Clark

I’m going to be super honest here; when I gave my novels to four people to read, I was very nervous about sharing 17 years of my life with someone. So I told them that, and asked for gentle criticism, but to not sugar coat it too much so that they weren’t honest if something didn’t work. This gave the readers guidelines to work with, help them think about how they’d formulate their comments and develop a positive and constructive feedback process. (erggg I hate corporate speak, but it’s an easy shortcut) It will also help both of us when we finally sit down to go through their comments, as we will both be coming at it from that constructive mindset, rather than taking the comments personally.

Besides my “be kind” request, I also asked them to note anything down as they read that either needed work or they felt worked well. That way I can physically see where they feel something works (or doesn’t). It’s a more intuitive process, and it allows me to follow them physically through their reading process. I was pleasantly surprised to find that once the action started, I received a lot more ticks than crosses, and I could see the places where they became confused.

Be kind

Anyone who followed NZ’s response to COVID, will know this line began as a tag line that then became a cliche in our government’s response, but it is good advice – both in life and when giving or receiving feedback.

“When virtues are pointed out first, flaws seem less insurmountable.” – Judith Martin

Whether or not you suffer from low self-esteem or not, you are still coming from a vulnerable place – this is your creative baby you’ve nursed over quite a long time (anyone got a tally higher than 17 years? Ok J.R.R. Tolkien and Mark Twain, I see you in the back) So if some of the feedback is critical, and hopefully constructive, remind yourself:

  • You asked for the feedback, and this is a favour to you.
  • They’re coming at this book with fresh eyes, whereas you know this story inside and out. So if they’re confused about something then play close attention. It might not be where they’re got confused, but earlier in the piece that needs work. And hopefully, it’s a quick fix.
  • Let the person give their feedback first without interrupting, which means it will probably be pretty general to start off with. If you take notes then you can always come back to the point to clarify what their point is.
  • Ask questions, like “What did you think worked?” and “What stuck out to you?” If they say, “This bit was boring” or “I didn’t like this bit” find out why. It could be that the prose didn’t flow well at this section or you’ve missed a tiny (but important) plot hole. But don’t overload them; if you want line by line feedback, then hire an editor.
  • You don’t have to take their advice, but listening will help you understand an outsider’s perspective of your book better.
  • And thank them for their feedback at the end, because, whatever you do with that feedback, for a moment you got to share that creative process with them.

It’s well known at work that when I’m listening to criticism, I have quite an intense stare, which has been likened to laser eye kiwi. To combat this I let people know that I’m just thinking about their comments and how it fits into the story. I also take notes, so that this steel destroying gaze isn’t on the person the whole time, thereby keeping them and their ideas safe from being cut in two. And I always thank them for their feedback, even if I don’t think it’s particularly useful – remember the person took the time to read/look at your story and even more time thinking about what they thought.

Then I go home and rage at the world…haha.

But, no really.

Sometimes a little private tantrum will help you clear your head and make you think more clearly (and constructively) about your work. (Works for me as a tv editor anyway)

What to do with the feedback

“Remember: when people tell you something’s wrong or doesn’t work for them, they are almost always right. When they tell you exactly what they think is wrong and how to fix it, they are almost always wrong.” – Neil Gaiman

Ultimately, what you do with feedback is up to you. You can address the issues they raise, you can ignore them, or pick and choose what you address. But one thing I’ve learnt from being a tv editor for several (million) years, if multiple people give you the same feedback then it’s probably something you should look at. And often it’s about setting up something earlier in the piece, or defining the story earlier, not at the point they’re tallking about.

I’m going to finish with an anecdote about a writing class exercise I took part in some years ago. You’d submit a piece and then receive anonymous feedback from four of your classmates. As an exercise it’s great, because often you’ll receive similar feedback. But this time, three gave great feedback with very small critiques.

The fourth person?

They wrote “I don’t understand this” and “it doesn’t make sense” as their feedback and pretty much nothing else.

So which feedback do you think I followed?

So what do you think of my blog about feedback? Too personal? Do the bullet points work? Or do I look lazy? Because I am being lazy, but I don’t want it to look like it…

Have fun out there

🙂

The Rewrite – Get analytical

FeaturedThe Rewrite – Get analytical

To be honest, I feel like a bit of a fraud writing this, since I don’t know that I’ve ever successfully done a rewrite on a story. I mean, it’s 17 years later and it looks like I’m about to hit Revision No.5 of my first novel! However, as a reality show editor, I’ve spent the last 20 years (! urgh) re-editing, re-cutting, re-everything on shows that I’ve worked with, and it’s helped me create quite an analytical approach to the re-edit/rewrite process. With any form of writing there’s always so much to analyse, but in this blog I’m going to focus on what I’m concentrating on at present; plot, themes and structure.

So here are some tips, bolstered by what published authors, who have way more experience about writing, have to say:

Books aren’t written, they’re rewritten. Including your own. It is one of the hardest things to accept, especially after the seventh rewrite hasn’t quite done it … – Michael Crichton

I hear you Michael, currently heading into rewrite no. 5 when I swore rewrite no. 4 would be the end!

Let’s get analytical

I really hope you’re singing that to the Olivia Newton-John tune right now, because I always do.

For me, putting aside my creative self, the one who passionately and doggedly worked through the novel, is vital, but I’m always conflicted. That creative buzz that pushed you through to the end is as addictive as any drug, and to coldly slice away at the art you’ve created can feel wrong. However, while that creative buzz has always helped me finish my first draft, it’s being able to refine that story so that it flows and is succinct, that will make it watchable/readable.

As Sir Arthur Quiller-Couch famously said (not William Faulkner):

Whenever you feel an impulse to perpetrate a piece of exceptionally fine writing, obey it — wholeheartedly — and delete it before sending your manuscript to press. Murder your darlings….

But that doesn’t mean you get rid of everything you love. The rule of thumb is to assess whether it serves your purpose and your story.

A scrupulous writer, in every sentence that he writes, will ask himself at least four questions, thus: 1. What am I trying to say? 2. What words will express it? 3. What image or idiom will make it clearer? 4. Is this image fresh enough to have an effect? – George Orwell

If you’d read my blog on writing outlines, you’ll have seen that I’m currently in the process of reverse engineering an outline. Essentially I’m breaking my novel down into plot points and working out what is necessary to the story. While it’s not quite as succinct as Dan Brown’s one line per chapter, it does give me an idea of what I want to achieve in each section and, ultimately, the entire novel. This definitely means cutting out large swatches of text, but I’ll also be adding in small details or paragraphs to other sections to help drive the story forward. I’ve got lots of examples from Edit No. 4, but in Edit No. 5 the biggest one is my obsession with the two main characters taking a joy ride around the city. The purpose was initially about establishing their friendship and the geography of the city, but ultimately this can be done when the protagonist arrives. Knowing where to get the best icecream is not essential to this horror fantasy thriller, since it’s not going to save her or, more importantly, get her into trouble, so it has to go. (Gelato, the story of a dairy intolerant woman imprisoned in an icecream parlour could be the modern twist to the horror that we’ve all been looking for.) That’s 10,000 words that I don’t need, easily excised from the book without anyone ever knowing that I once toiled for a week on it. (sob)

And while I still need to establish the coastal geography of the city, I can do this in a short paragraph when the protagonist arrives. Alas, not one icecream in sight, but it serves the story far better. Ultimately, asking myself those essential questions will drive my story along and help me convey the themes I want to get across more easily.

When your story is ready for rewrite, cut it to the bone. Get rid of every ounce of excess fat. This is going to hurt; revising a story down to the bare essentials is always a little like murdering children, but it must be done. – Stephen King

Wise words Stephen, wise words.

Analyse the structure

There are a lot of authors who use structure to help form the story and to carry the reader along – I’m immediately thinking of Margaret Atwood and Stephen King, who use different forms of book structure to bring their story to life – and they also employ the cliffhanger approach, although in different ways. Margaret Atwood uses subtle cliffhangers, where you are left wanting more even when there’s no physical action in the chapter. The biggest exception is the end of The Handmaid’s Tale, when we are left not knowing if June ever escaped out of Gilead, or if she was caught. Towards the end of my novel I actively employed using a cliffhanger at the end of each chapter, and it certainly made the story flow better. The question mark asked at the end of one chapter isn’t resolved until halfway through the next (at the earliest), so it keeps the reader moving on. It’s definitely something I’ll employ in Edit No. 5, even if it’s a subtle question asked.

You have to do tricks with pacing, alternate long sentences with short, to keep it vital and alive…. Virtually every page is a cliffhanger–you’ve got to force them to turn it.”~”
Author: Dr. Seuss

Another way to look at the novel is to think of how you’d like it to look at the end, and how that will affect your story. In The Drawing of the Three, Stephen King uses tarot card images to divide up the novel. Every time you come to one you immediately know that you’re about to meet a new character, and that they will feature heavily in the story. This technique adds an element of intrigue to the book and keeps the reader turning those pages, but this time as a kind of foreshadowing.

For my novel I’m using the different phases of the moon to divide the book into parts, and I’m doing this to re-enforce the time frame and time limit my characters face, one that isn’t so obvious in the opening few chapters but becomes more apparent as the moon moves through its different phases.

“In the first act you get your hero up a tree. The second act, you throw rocks at him. For the third act you let him down.” — George Abbott, American theater producer and director

However you choose to structure your novel, it should always serve the story or message you’re trying to convey. It should always work for and not against your plot, but enhance it and add elements that will keep the reader interested.

Final words from the “Mathematician”

Ultimately, revising work can be long and quite depressing, and, while I hate to impose the “mathematician’s” viewpoint on it, analysing the structure will help you define and refine your story or message you want to convey. Whether that’s how the overall novel will look to a phrase you’ve worked tirelessly on, it will help you kill your unnecessary darlings while keeping (or even adding) the ones that will create a more cohesive piece.

Well, that’s the theory, anyway, and since I’m currently putting it all into practice, I’ll let you know how I get on!

Put down everything that comes into your head and then you’re a writer. But an author is one who can judge his own stuff’s worth, without pity, and destroy most of it. – Colette

The Beach – a kind of analysis

FeaturedThe Beach – a kind of analysis

You know, I was all ready for a very quick blog post about my fast fiction, and how I’d been inspired by the recent convergence of king tides, an ex cyclone and the Tongan tsunami when ol’ Omicron decided to change up my day.

Don’t worry, I don’t have the ‘cron, or at least not yet.

Oh no no no, we had an “unscheduled press conference” from the NZ Prime Minister today, and we are now in the red light district. No word of a lie.

Photo by Designecologist on Pexels.com

Of course, it would be way kind of cooler if that meant we could all have a wild night out. Now it’s a wild night in of creating WFH (Work From Home for you lucky people who don’t know what that is) forms and emailing all the contractors who are starting tomorrow. So all I have to really say is “Hi!” and “Thanks for reading the fast fiction!”

Drop me a line if you think I’ve accidentally left in any adjectives. I desperately hope not, but will happily take any pointers. (oh hardy haha)

Kia kaha and stay safe x

FWFFC 2 – The Beach

FeaturedFWFFC 2 – The Beach

Describe a location without using adjectives.

The wave slammed onto the beach and chased Eric, licking at his sandals as he struggled in the sand. He clambered onto a dune just as the wave caught up to him, tearing away a chunk and leaving him imprisoned in tussock a metre above the beach. A hundred metres to his left, a tree, branches and all, cartwheeled in the surf, coming to rest hard up against the dune.

There was no one else on the beach, and the roar of the waves drowned everything out, even the call of the seagulls flying above him. He felt like the last man alive, and he thought of the movie with Charlton Heston and the speaking monkeys, and he shivered, longing to see someone, anyone.

He turned his attention back to the tree, or at least to the beach access just beyond the tree, and he began to sidle towards it. The dunes were steep, and it didn’t take long for his sandals to fill with sand, making it tough going. He used a Keep off the dunes sign to pull himself up higher and wiped sweat away from his face. He kicked at the Tussock grass is precious and vital to the dunes! sign an eco-head had added to it; it was all well and bloody good being precious about those clumps of straw when there was beach to walk on, but right now Eric couldn’t give a toss. It was either kill them or die himself.

He moved forward again and immediately stepped on some tussock.

“Sorry,” he muttered, feeling the shame burn him hotter than the sun, “It’s the only way.”

Four Weekly Fast Fiction Challenge 2

FeaturedFour Weekly Fast Fiction Challenge 2

One idea.

One week.

350 word limit.

Time is relative right? Sure, we’ll go with that, so this is obviously four weeks since the last challenge.

And it is…

Describe a location without using adjectives.

That’s right, no adjectives, no describer, identifier, qualifier or modifier.

No pretty’s, shining’s, twisted.

Good luck!

The Outline

FeaturedThe Outline

It’s funny that I’m writing about this, as I’ve only become a recent convert. In fact, right now, I’m reverse engineering an outline for my first book, so I can work out what stays and what goes. (Hint: Only the important stuff)

Like all recent converts to this idea, I’m pretty fanatical and obsessive about the idea of writing to an outline. Not only does it help me clarify exactly what happens in my book, but gets me to think about who my characters are in a clearer way, which should hopefully transmit onto the page.

Since I’m a recent convert, I’m going to rely heavily on authors’ comments on the outline, and why knowing where you’re going is so important.

But first, my two cents…

As a writer, who at best is free only two or three hours a week to write, having an outline helps me keep on track with my story, my characters and where they’re headed. That way I don’t spend an unnecessary 30,000 words on a day trip through a city, unless it has a point. (Yes I am guilty of this in my novel, and it’s being excised as we speak!) If knowing about the layout of the city is so important, then I should set this up in a paragraph at the start of the novel, not waste a chapter on ferry rides and icecreams, as delicious they sound in the depths of winter. They also make me aware of any glaring holes in my story.

It clarifies your story and characters, and highlights plot holes or places where exposition is needed.

It should make your novel flow better and be punchier, and, in turn, more exciting to read.

Anyway, enough of my two cents worth, here’s what Dan Brown, who was the author who converted me, has to say on the matter. (And if you keep thinking that my quotes seem like they come from their Masterclass sessions, then you’d be right! I’ve been watching these for a year now, and I find every lesson from an author or storyteller invaluable)

“One of the easiest things you can do is create one bullet point, what is this chapter trying to accomplish?…That is the purpose of this chapter.” – Dan Brown

This is actually a great point for the whole story – your novel or short story should be able to be condensed down into a byline or one-liner. Think of yourself writing the back jacket cover, trying to entice someone in. What is the exciting, thrilling and titillating moments that will draw you in? From there you then build your story outline, a description of what happens. It doesn’t normally contain dialogue or description, but it’s more about the characters and the plot, with an emphasis on the aspect that will be the most important to you in the writing.

Dan Brown likes to build an outline with a general story structure, where he takes one idea and expands upon it, but from there he builds his chapters, writing a one liner for each chapter. From that he figures out what research, dialogue, descriptions and action that he will need. For e.g. in Origin, for a chapter he wrote “Rabbi Yehuda Köves dies”, but then he “had fun with it“, filling out the story of Köves’ death with an action sequence spread across the city. The one liner tells the author what the chapter is about, and after that, you can decide how that chapter will be told.

I write an outline for a book. The outlines are very specific about what each scene is to accomplish.” – James Paterson

James Paterson is an interesting author as he spends most of his time on the outline. He will then either write the story very quickly himself, or use a ghost writer to write the novel. This collaborative effort means that he has a much higher output than most authors, but his main focus is the outline and the plot itself. You might not be a fan of his writing technique or his books, but it’s this focus on the plot that means his novels are already formed before a word of it has been written and make them hard to put down.

James Paterson also has makes a great point about characters who have a mind of their own. Basically, he doesn’t believe in it. They’re a character in your novel, and if you reach a point where you think they’d behave differently from what you had planned, then it’s likely you’ve either found yourself a plot hole or you need to change your character. For him, the outline is a way to fix the plot holes before you spend 30,000 words on them and have your characters meander around (guilty, your honour!). It helps you to focus on what must be accomplished and when.

There is a flip side to writing outlines, and a lot of authors don’t believe in it. In fact, Stephen King, probably at his harshest, says this:

“Outlines are the last resource of bad fiction writers who wish to God they were writing masters’ theses.” – Stephen King

Ouch.

But for Stephen King, who’s a successful writer who has the luxury of being able to write full-time, I think this ignores the reality for so many of us writing. We write in the spaces between life, whether that be work, family, pets or social engagements – and all the interruptions that it brings. So when you can only write two or three times a week, then having an idea of where you’re going actually helps you to stay on track. I had a vague outline for my recent draft, but I really feel like a more detailed outline would’ve helped me avoid a lot of unnecessary moments – icecreams excluded, of course.

For those of you struggling with life’s intrusions, click here for my recent blog on LIFE.

Your takeaway from this blog should be “you do you”, but I’d suggest using a basic outline as a guide, and perhaps even a life raft, for when you’re in the middle of your novel and feeling those writing blues coming on. Plus, if you’re anything like me, where you may only have a precious couple of hours a week to write, an outline will tell you where you came from and where you’re going, and hopefully, keeping you on track.

Happy writing!

P.S.: My second Four Week Fast Fiction Challenge is coming out tomorrow, so watch out for the challenge. The idea is pretty simple (if you ignore the fact it’s been longer than four weeks):

One idea

One week

350 word limit

Can’t wait to see what you come up with!

LIFE

FeaturedLIFE

Or How to lose friends and write.

LIFE. It’s the big obstacle, it’s the one that keeps you in the way of being a literary genius that will surpass Charles Dickens, Margaret Atwood and Salman Rushdie in ideas, depth of work and insight. If only, LIFE wasn’t always there poking its nose in and getting in the way, imagine how prolific and famous we would all be.

Look at me, I’m a prime example. Above is a collage of the past three weeks of my life, when I’ve been off work and supposedly had time to write two months of blogs all in one hit. From prioritising teaching modules for my company to wearing silly Christmas hats while imbibing gin, LIFE has just been getting in the way. Even right now, I’m in the middle of making focaccia bread, have a half finished kitchen to clean and a backyard that’s starting to make the Amazon rain forest like a well designed park. But I’m currently ignoring all those LIFE things, thanks mainly to New Zealand’s harsh sun. I reserve these things for early mornings or late evenings, when dusty, hot work actually doesn’t make you feel like an overcooked turkey on Christmas Day – not that many in NZ have turkey on Christmas Day, we are currently having 30 degree celcius, cloudless sky weather.

But, even with LIFE doing it’s damnedest to distract me, I’m proudly tip tapping – hang on, just got to brush oil on the focaccia bread and heat up the oven – away. Most Kiwis (NZers for those not familiar with our lingo) are still sunning themselves on a beach somewhere, or stuck in heavy traffic as they wind their way to the next sunny spot. One reason our GDP is so low is probably because we take around 3 to 6 weeks off every year and call it “Christmas and New Years” (stole that joke but it’s a goody).

Just going to pop the focaccia in the oven.

So how do you make room for your writing when LIFE is so persistent?

For me, I’ve followed two authors’ advice, and it’s kept me on the reasonably straight and true now for around 5 years. Stephen King, in his book, On Writing, talks about writing in between the two jobs he had to make ends meet and on breaks. That’s where he wrote Carrie and Salem’s Lot, in between cleaning up after kids at school and cleaning laundry in the evenings. To stay motivated, he set himself a goal and stuck to it, and for him, that was the key to his success. .

Write a minimum of 2000 words a day to avoid “the smooch of death.” – Stephen King

He also goes on to say “Read and write four to six hours a day. If you cannot find the time for that, you can’t expect to become a good writer,” but I think that’s a little harsh, particularly if you have a family or any kind of responsibility. James Paterson suggests an hour a day, which I think is more doable. But one thing I want to note here is that both of these authors are men who had wives to bring up their children, clean the house and do all that mundane stuff. So for me, who has neither a wife nor a live in housekeeper, my attitude is to find five minutes every day, no matter what. Sometimes this is just writing down observations I’ve had, or fancy descriptions that might one day come in useful (“the sun shimmered off the singing wire” is the latest), but it’s also a mind trick. Because if I have five minutes to write, then it will most likely spur me on to find another twenty from somewhere.

Oops, computer has to restart, see you in five….

Damn you LIFE!

Back again, although now on my phone, as the restart is taking an awfully long time. But the good news is that I got the bread out of the oven before it burned.

Anyway, where was I?

Oh yeah, LIFE, and how to combat it.

By setting myself a small goal, I know it’s achievable and will keep me engaged in the act of writing, and hopefully, what I’m writing. It does mean writing long form does require a lot of effort and planning, but I do think you’re also less likely to have characters run off and do their own thing. They tend to get bored with LIFE much faster than you and just want to get on with it.

I also just realised that I should research what some female authors say about making time, so no one feels that I’m being biased here. So when my computer restarts that’s going to go here.

Every female writer all have good advice, which is to say that they all say:

Write every day if you can, no matter how awful you think it is. Just keep doing it.” – Margaret Atwood

But I do like Natalie Goldberg’s advice, particularly about being realistic about how much you can write in one day and setting that time aside as though it’s and appointment.

Beware of sweeping commitments: they usually have the opposite effect. Rather than writing every day, you’ll write no days. Instead, be pragmatic: look at your calendar. If next week you can fit in only a half hour for writing on Tuesday from ten to ten-thirty in the morning, good. Mark it down. Do you have another window of time? For how long? Be specific, jot it down: four to five-thirty Friday.– Natalie Goldberg

Also, don’t be afraid to think about your story and form a plan of how you’re going to approach it. L.M. Montgomery, author of Anne of Green Gables, was in the habit of “brooding up” a story, so that she was more efficient at the keyboard.

I write fast, having thought out plot and dialogue while I go about my household work. I only do three hours’ literary work a day—two hours’ writing and one typewriting.” – L M Montgomery

So, in conclusion…

Make a time and stick your minimum goal.

“Your job is to make sure the muse knows where you’re going to be every day from nine ‘til noon or seven ‘til three. If he does know, I assure you that sooner or later he’ll start showing up, chomping his cigar and making his magic.” – Stephen King

This does come with caveats, prioritising your writing is important, but being a human being is also important. How else are you going to be inspired or discover things if you’re not in the real world, if you’re not in LIFE. In those times, fall back in your minimum and try and stick to it.

And…

Use whatever means you can to write.

This blog is a perfect example of how I started off with an idea, jotted down some notes and lines in my diary, wrote them out on a laptop and finished them on my phone (restart is still going – that’s a doozy of an update). In the 21st Century we have so many devices available to help us, and while many are designed to also distract, if you use them the right way, you can beat LIFE at its own game.

So, that’s me done, just in time to taste the focaccia bread I made while writing this, and to finally login to my updated laptop.

Happy writing and good luck fending off LIFE. And if you have any tricks, comment below, because I always need a good defense strategy against LIFE.

Research or Be Damned!

FeaturedResearch or Be Damned!

I’ve been struggling with writing about this, (but that’s not the reason it’s being posted late – Christmas is such a time vampire!) mostly because for my writing I tend to choose locations and occupations I already know (and place my characters in fictional locations), so I don’t do a huge amount of research. But doing some research is essential, otherwise you are bound to make errors that will be obvious to the reader and cause the “bullshit detector”, as Stephen King calls it, to go off.

I’ve written a lot below, but every point comes back to one main point:

It creates a believable base from which you can spring your story from.

So:

Do enough research to make your story believable.

“Research belongs as far in the background and the back story as you can get it.” Stephen King

For a writer, story is king, but that doesn’t mean you ignore the real world, even if you’re writing about a world that isn’t Earth. Everything needs a solid base to jump off from, and a reader will pick up on sloppy research as much as they will plot holes – in fact, they’ll probably be the same thing half the time.

So take the time to do some research on topics that will be necessary for your story. Writing a fantasy about knights? Then join a cos play or re-enactment group and learn to shoot an arrow and wield a sword, because it’s a lot harder than you think. Writing a novel about cyber warfare? Then you should probably get to know the hacker culture and a lot of the techniques that are used, like data mining and creating zombie computers (or bots). Having some practical knowledge, or speaking to someone in your field of interest, will help the reader to accept the story you’re peddling because it’s based, in some part, in the real world.

Like Stephen King, I have a healthy respect for research, but at the same time I feel it should be tempered with the fact you’re writing a work of fiction. He has been advised by a number of people over the years and uses this as a base to jump off from, and chooses what to keep and what to use. While you should always keep in mind what’s current in the real world, you should also temper that with the need to keep a story rolling.

For me, I had main characters that worked as nurses in a private hospital, and because I wrote several drafts over 17 years, I had to significantly change their work processes and even their uniforms to match medical advancements and a dramatic change in hospital culture in that time. Luckily for me, I have a family that are all based in the medical field, so I didn’t have to go far to find advisors who could set me straight! But I also took their advice with a pinch of salt – I’m not writing a medical journal article on modern nursing practices, so if one or two things aren’t quite right then it’s not a big deal, and if it’s for the greater good of the story, then sometimes it’s necessary.

Visit locations

I’ve stolen this tip from Dan Brown, who likes to base his action sequences and stories in very real well known places. For him, it’s essential to know the location like the back of your hand, and he will often visit the location several times, even taking a video camera with him.

While this is great if you’re going to write a best seller based in the Louvre, if you’re writing a historical kitchen sink drama or a sci-fi fantasy, it might not seem that important, but nonetheless you still need to understand how that place sounded, smelt and felt for you to imbue your locations with solidity. So do your research, imagine what it would be like to be in a tiny tin can in the middle of a vast vacuum, or to walk down a 18th century street, where human waste ran along the side in small gutters.

Use respected sources

It’s pretty simple; unless you’re writing about conspiracy theorists then use respected resources and accepted scientific information. For her MadAddam trilogy, Margaret Atwood first delved into current genetic manipulation research and used that as a jumping off platform for what she calls her “ustopian” world. She even went to a convention and spoke about genetically modified animals, before announcing that half of the animals she’d spoken about weren’t yet real (scarily, the other half are very much in existence).

Having a file of information (literally or cyberlly) from which to jump off from, will again bring about a base, or starting point, to the world (or story) that is relatable and understandable to the reader.

Only reveal the information when it’s needed and in small, palatable amounts.

Don’t fall into the trap of writing a dissertation in the middle of your story to get across the information you need. Let it inform your location descriptions, your character’s knowledge or actions, and sprinkle the research throughout your story. Besides making it easier to digest, it will probably create a level of intrigue that will keep your reader…well reading.

And isn’t that what we all want?

Good luck out there!

Fast Fiction Discussion: Why the Firewall?

FeaturedFast Fiction Discussion: Why the Firewall?

I have a terrible confession.

I was once scammed, allowing someone to access my computer and phone data, simply because I clicked on a text

Yes, I believed the courier package text I was sent was stuck at the airport, although I will admit to clicking on the “You’ve won $5,000” emails for shits and giggles. After watching Mr. Robot (excellent series btw) and now understanding that you don’t have to click through to a website for them to steal all of your data, I’ll be a little more cautious.

I hope.

And that’s why my fast fiction was about the silent superhero in my life, the firewall.

After writing this story, I was asked me to explain explain firewalls and scams, but, to be honest, besides knowing that a firewall acts as a gateway from your personal or work computers to the internet, and that they can be physical hardware as well as software, I really don’t have a clue. So, if you want to read up on what types of firewalls there are out there and work out if you’re properly protected, then click here.

For anyone wanting to read on about scams, and in particular, my flirtation with them, read on.

I’m in the unenviable situation of having a 6 digit cellphone number (not counting the mobile carrier’s number), so I’m often one of the first to get pinged by scam artists. Yes I answered a phone call from an unknown number in Hamilton, and yes, I clicked on that courier package text and went through to the website, but they’ve taught me to be cautious. After a $90 bill for answering the phone to a recorded message, I no longer answer unlisted or unknown numbers, and I expect people to either go old school and leave a message or send me a text. I’ve had a few issues because of this, but I certainly haven’t lost any money (clarification: that I haven’t wanted to lose). And as for those pesky package texts, weirdly one of the couriers I use text you status updates, but they always state who they are and what order number it relates to, so I’ve learnt to tell the difference between the scam and the real deal.

So here’s a few tips I’ve learnt over the years about avoiding a scam (or is this the scam? haha):

  • Think before you click or pick up that call. You have to be your own firewall and anti-virus software to protect yourself from phone calls, texts and seemingly legitimate emails. So before you click, swipe or pick up that call, Are you waiting on a courier package? Did you enter a competition? Is that call expected, or from a region where you know someone? Being your own silent superhero and staying alert will help you avoid most scams.
  • Have anti-virus software, even on a Mac. It acts as a firewall, checking information coming into the computer through files and data for any known malware. Apple products have traditionally been less susceptible to virus attacks and scams, but in the last ten years some have found their way their systems, so anti-virus is that extra layer of protection. Choose one that updates regularly and has good reviews on the internet. Click here for reviews of the latest anti-virus software doing the rounds.
  • Don’t click on those ridiculous “What kind of friend from Friends am I?” or “What House from Harry Potter am I?”, and certainly don’t answer personal information about you on Facebook. A lot of these games and shareable quizzes are set up by bots to steal information for possible password guesses, and some of those Facebook quizzes were actually set up to mine information about you for political gain. I know someone who has fallen for these multiple times. Sometimes it’s a hacker with a sense of humour who will throw up crude jokes, but it doesn’t stop there. Once you’ve allowed them access to your profile, email address, friends’ lists and posts, they can continue to mine your data for months and was used by political parties (and a special shout out to Russia here as well) to target voters.
  • Use social media like it’s a public platform that everyone can see. Because everyone can. It can sometimes be easy to steal your data or identity from an innocent post you think is just for your friends but is actually publicly available. So don’t post photos of you with your first credit card or your vaccination passport, because you’re giving scammers the gift that could cost you a lifetime of stress and money woes.
  • Change your social media profiles so only your friends can see what you’re posting. While my instagram account is public, my facebook profile is private and can only be seen by my friends. It means photos of me need to approved by me to go on Facebook, and only my friends can see what I post, and it means that to a degree I’m protected. But always remember the rule above this one, because settings can be reset by social media companies easily when they do updates. Oh, and stay off TikTok. You think FB is bad, when you sign up you give TikTok permission to mine all of your data from your phone, including biometric information, keyboard strokes and bank passwords.
  • Don’t answer numbers you don’t recognise. That’s pretty simple, and as long as you tell your friends and work colleagues what you’re doing, then it’s a pretty hassle free options. And if people aren’t interested in leaving a message or sending a follow up text, they can’t really want to talk to you (but that’s probably from a very privileged situation)!
  • Don’t do what I’ve done and click on those scam emails for fun. Most likely the email itself is harmless, but some emails are set up to automatically load attachments, which may carry worms and viruses. And even though they’re cyber worms and viruses, they’re still not fun and the treatments you take to get rid of them are a lot more expensive! If you do, best case scenario is that they steal your passwords; worse case, they encrypt your servers and demand money to unencrypt them. If you realise as soon as you’ve clicked through, then I suggest quitting out and changing ALL (and I mean ALL) of your passwords immediately.
  • Don’t engage with the scammers. You’re just wasting your time and their time, and they may be trying to infiltrate your work or personal computer while you think you’re having a laugh. Particularly if they then send an automatically loading attachment.
  • NEVER click a link that leads to a website, particularly if it’s for a bank or a payment service. ALWAYS load up the website yourself by typing in the web address. Often scammers will have set up a website that is a duplicate of your bank or service with only minor differences, and then place a link to this website in the email to direct you through to it. They can then record your keyboards strokes for bank passwords or even take your credit card information. I recently got an email telling me that my car registration was due, and the only reason I didn’t get caught was because I loaded up the website manually and not from the email. If you fall for one of these – and we’re all fallible – your best bet is to notify your bank immediately, cancel all of your cards and change all of your passwords. It’s a pain, but it’s the best way of protecting yourself.
  • Use an email host who’s serious about security. Yahoo was particularly susceptible to cyber attacks ten years ago, but they’ve gone to great lengths to make their systems more secure. Google are good, they have great in-built filters in Gmail, but I’d suggest you do your own research before you choose an email address.

I think that’s it. My brain thinks it is anyway!

So have a good time out on the internet, looking at your friends’ babies (furry or human, I don’t judge) and filming yourself doing fun dances (just not on TikTok ok?), but before clicking on that quiz or that courier package text, always remember:

I am my own Firewall. So is this a good idea?

Fast Fiction Challenge: Wall

FeaturedFast Fiction Challenge: Wall

The Silent Superhero

I am silent, invisible, the superhero you don’t know is there.  I am the one that destroys the malignant ones and zeros as they try to break their way into your life.    I am here 24/7, my  neverevending watch guarding you against the world.

Sometimes the push of the crowd at the gates mean I must accept their word and hope that the allied site hasn’t been invaded.  And sometimes I see the danger before you have even popped your head over the parapet.

I see you order the gates open for “Your courier package is at the Airport” and “You’ve won $5,000”, and I know the enemies hidden in these Trojan horses.  I fight as they try to worm their way through my cracks, attempting to hold you hostage. 

I can protect you from these enemies, but there are places that you go that are full of danger.  You choose to trade with sites that carry both good and bad data, who ask you to share your dreams and then sell it to the highest bidder.  They hide behind family photos and fun emojis as they poison your mind; they are magicians with a slight of hand, who will direct you away from the rational flow of numbers so that you will trade only with them.  I stand aside as they march past me, digitally thumbing their digital nose at me, and I feel a deep shame for my master.

So think of me when you click and scroll and :).  I stand at your gates, ever vigilant and ever loyal.  I can save you from the evildoers, but I can’t save you from yourself. 

So next time you click on a link, ask yourself:

What would my Firewall do?

Find Your People

FeaturedFind Your People

Once you figure out what your passion is, surround yourself with like-minded people who can help you grow.
Jessica St. Clair
, actress and comedian

This feels like a deeply philosophical entry this week, because finding your people can be applied to your life generally, but I believe it’s most important when it comes to being creative. If you’re a young writer starting out or an older writer working away at your opus, finding a writing group to share your work with can you help develop your skills and confidence.
But, of course, it’s got to be the right people.

Below are some practical tips to help you find and form a writing group that will be “your kind of people.”

Finding Your People

Creativity is contagious. Pass it on.” – Albert Einstein

When I was growing up, being creative was considered a little weird, and even though I wrote poems from a very young age, it was never looked on as a serious pursuit. It wasn’t until I stumbled onto my writing group (shout out to MSWG) that I began to take my writing more seriously and etch out regular writing time in my busy life. And it all happened quite by accident; after I mentioned to a friend from work that I wrote short stories and novels, she suggested I join a group she was involved in.

And that’s probably the biggest and best tip:

Talk about it

You don’t need to drop it into every conversation, but talking about it amongst your friends can lead you to a writing group that will likely be close to you geographically and in philosophy. Some schools have groups already set up, and if you’re at university studying the arts in some form, there’s bound to be a writing group or three floating around, but it’s important to speak up to find the right people.

If you can’t seem to find one then, create a writing group yourself.

As above, signing up for writing courses will help you find a group of people who are interested in writing and sharing their work, but from whatever source you find your writing group, be prepared to be the driving force behind the group, at least until it’s been running for a while. People will expect you to organise meetings, who’s reading what and find the venue as well. These days this is pretty easy by using a group message app like WhatsApp or Messenger, and you can set yourself a calendar reminder in your phone to prompt you to message about the meeting. It doesn’t take a lot of work, but you should have an enjoyment for organising. If you don’t, then I suggest you either split the work or find someone in the group who has that natural bent.

Organise regular meetings


The size of the group will depend on how often you meet, but I’d suggest for a group of 6 or less you should probably meet up once a month. This gives people time to write and submit, plus it gives you a chance to have a life outside of writing! If the group is larger, or you do want to meet up more regularly, then I suggest splitting up the organising amongst a few of you, and you each take turns sorting the meetings and the venue. Using some form of group messaging is definitely the way to go, so everyone can read and respond in one spot, and it’s easier to spread the organising among a few of you.

Manage the group’s size and expectations


Having a large group of ten or more people can often mean that some people’s voices and work get lost by, what we’ll call, the “more creative” and “noisier” people, so managing the size and expectation of how often people will get to submit their work is really important.

If you’ve started your writing group from a writing course, then you’ll invariably start with a large number of people, and as the months go by you’ll see numbers drop off as life gets in the way of the writiing group for some people. Those first few months need careful management to ensure everyone feels included and has a chance to submit something and give feedback. You could decide to have more regular meetings, say every fortnight, but I think you should also create a roster of who’s expected to submit and who’s expected to give feedback at each meeting. That way everyone is getting a chance to show off their work and have their voice work. It will also mean the more dominant members won’t completely take over the group and make it all about them.

Another solution with a larger group is splitting into different writing groups and run them simultaneously. That way, people still get to submit and give feedback every time, and it may help to keep people coming along if they get to have a voice more. It also means that people can move between the groups to get a taste of everyone’s writing and find a group that suits them best. But to do this well, you’ll obviously need a co-organiser(s) to run the group who has a similar attitude towards how the group should be run, which brings me to…

Ground rules


It’s important that you set up what sort of group you’re going to be from the start and make sure people know what to expect. This includes how often meetings are, if there’s a roster for who’s going to submit and who gives feedback, but most importantly, the type of feedback you’re going to give. There are lots of different ways to give feedback to people’s work, but I think it’s important to at least employ the constructive criticism technique, giving 2 positive to 1 negative feedback. In a situation where someone begins to go into lengthy feedback that feels quite negative, I suggest interrupting and putting a more positive spin on it without actually calling them out. After all, this group is here to encourage people to write, not to break them down and destroy their love of the creative process.

This is also why I’m not a great believer in a technique developed post World War 2 by a writing group comprising of ex soldiers. Used in a few US colleges and universities in other parts of the world, the technique is only give negative feedback and to basically tear the work apart to make it better. As someone who’s worked in the creative industry for over 20 years(!), I find people take criticism better when it’s tempered with positive feedback. It puts people at ease, they are generally less defensive and more open to the feedback, plus it gives them more energy and enthusiasm for what they’re doing, because it seems fixable. It keeps the love of creative writing alive, and that’s the most important thing you want out of this writing group.

MSWG’s rules are very simple but effective:

  • Rule 1: Give only compliments
    and
  • Rule 2: There is no rule 2, except you must accept the compliments
    For our group, which is made up of people with different styles and experience, it creates a safe space for people to share their work, and I always leave my writing group session invigorated and with new ideas to continue on my writing journey.

Which leads me to…

Variety is the spice of life

Don’t be afraid to have writers of different genre and styles in your group.; it will widen your reading and improve your work. When I joined MSWG, they had no idea I was an erotic horror fantasy writer, and yet they were welcoming and put me at my ease. Everyone in our group has different styles of writing and most definitely very different genre, but it makes reading the submissions a real pleasure as each piece is so different. It’s also given me new ideas on how to approach my writing – I’m very much a dialogue driven writer, and yet some of the work I read contains almost no dialogue, and it has made me think more critically about how I write. Plus, everyone has a different workflow, and you’ll be exposed to a variety of books, both fictional and on writing techniques, that will expand your writing knowledge and expertise.

Summary Time!

These are simple tips to creating and maintaining a writing group, but always remember to enjoy the experience of sharing your work and reading other people’s writing, and to spread that joy amongst your group. It’s like being a part of an exclusive club, reading extracts and pieces from other writers that the rest of the world know nothing about, and sometimes before they even hit the printing press, so revel in that!

AND….

Tomorrow I’ll be putting up my first Four Week Flash Fiction Challenge!

We’ll all have a week to write 350 words based on the challenge’s criteria, and then next week we can share them. I’ll post mine up, and if you want me to read your work, feel free to pop a link into the comments section of my FWFC!

Can’t wait to see what everyone comes up with!

Tips and Tricks – One at a time please!

FeaturedTips and Tricks – One at a time please!

It took me 17 years to write a novel, so I wouldn’t call myself an expert at writing, but what I’m very good at is procrastination and self-doubt, and I know I’m not alone in this. Finally finishing my novel and sending it out for review got me thinking about what advice I would give to people struggling to put pen to paper or, most likely, fingers to keyboard).

Each week I’m going to write up a tip or trick I’ve learnt over the last 17 years that helped me grow as a writer and as a person.

Then once every four weeks I’ll set myself – and you, if you dare! – a 350 word mini challenge. We’ll have a week to complete it and share it, and if you want me to read your piece simply place a hyperlink in the comments for me!

Without further ado, tip one….

Storytelling - you've got to love it

“The very reason I write is so that I might not sleepwalk through my entire life.” – Zadie Smith, autho

It’s a pretty simple tip, and every storyteller’s podcast or masterclass will tell you this. Let’s be honest, becoming a paid author is hard, and to make a living from it is even rarer, so you’ve got to love what you do. But it’s sometimes hard to love the creative process when your creative soul and ego get in the way and overwhelm you with self doubt. In \this blog I’ll look at ways to combat that super critical self, and maybe even use it to your advantage.

“The worst enemy to my creative writing is my self-doubt” – Syliva Plath

For me, I love love love the initial buzz of creation, but it’s the re-read and rewrite that brings the heartache and destroys the joy. I call this mean voice inside my mind Super Critical Self, because it’s the villain wanting to bring your creative process down, and it can often start when you’re still working on a story. It’s the one that re-reads the work that you’ve done and then whispers “it’s not good enough, you’re not good enough”. It can hold the creative process hostage and kill the story, or, more truthfully, your love for the story, before it’s even through it’s first write.

The biggest tip I can give you is the simplest:

Just keep going.

Even if you feel that the passion and joy has already been eaten away by the Super Critical Self, find a spot or a moment in the story where you can begin again. If you have an outline or a one liner, go back to that, check where you should be and make sure you get back on track. Often you’ll hear writers say that their characters have a mind of their own, but James Paterson has basically called bullshit on this concept, saying that if it’s in your outline then you need to pull them back into line. And I agree with this to a certain extent; sometimes you find a new twist or perspective on your story as you begin to write, and that’s ok too. But you should still know where you’ve been and where you’re going, and I think it would be really useful to revise the outline to reflect this new departure.

And if you are just lost in the maze of the story, use your outline or one liner to bring you back into check. Jump back to the moment where your characters began behaving badly and ask yourself why and how to change it. Or, just pick up where you left off, but this time following the outline.

The most important part of this process is to get that first draft down; then you will have something to look at, it will no longer be a concept in your in mind, and

You can always change it.

And you probably will; that’s why you have drafts.

If you’re like me, the second draft is your worst time. That first draft was written quickly and hastily, at the height of a mad passion for your story. But it’s when you go re-read your first draft that you see all the hastily formed sentences and concepts. In every line, paragraph and chapter I will find errors in my sentence structure, dialogue and plot. (I’d be a millionaire if I got paid by the dollar for every “Well” I have at the start of a dialogue piece.) It’s the most dangerous time for me, as my super critical self will eat away at my confidence until I want to give up. When I first wrote my novel 17 years ago, I hand wrote it over 6 weeks and then went into an electronic second draft immediately. It was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made, as I saw every tiny mistake and didn’t have perspective on the story. I began to hate the story with a passion, and even though I finished that first/second draft, I decided I never wanted to touch it again.

The story was ruined, and the story was damned.  

Of course, the story is never damned, and if I’d let it rest a few months I might have seen that.

After you’ve rested your draft, put that Super Critical Self to Work.

When I went back to the novel in mid 2017, I discovered that it was pacy and interesting. There were themes, story plot and it all moved along at a good clip. Yes, the characters needed fleshing out, yes there was no subplot, but on the surface it was a good story. I hadn’t ruined it after all; my Super Critical Self had simply ruined my love of telling the story.

The key here is to find a process that works for you and helps to silence that self-doubt. And the good news is that if you’re critical of your work, then you’re more likely to pick up on flaws and make the rewrite better.

So how do you put that super villain to work and help you out?

Even though it’s about tennis, there’s a great book called “The Inner Game of Tennis” by Tim Gallwey. In the book it talks about the critical self and teaches you how to silence that voice of self-doubt by putting it to work. So, in tennis for example, instead of having your Super Critical Self analyse each shot you play, which will make tense up your body and make you less likely to hit those good shots, you give that voice the task of analysing the game and your opponent’s strategy. I tell that critical voice to tell me where to put the shot, and I can honestly say it works a treat. I also believe you can apply this to writing.

So that Super Critical Self is wincing at your grammar, your spelling and your dialogue? Rolling its eyes at your descriptive scenes?

Ok, you say, help me make it better. Tell me where I’m going wrong.

All you’re really doing is simply reframing the process and changing its focus. You are accepting that it will need changes and trying to work out what works and what doesn’t, putting that little critical voice to work as your inner editor. For me I read through my story the first time without making any changes, noting down what I generally thought of each chapter or section and then writing up larger story notes at the end. Then with these in hand I dissect the piece and begin my rewrite, all the time thinking about structure and story. It’s also where I fix grammar, spelling mistakes and try and make my dialogue more dynamic, but I’d call this the finer details of everything. My Super Critical Self is there to ask “What’s the story?” or “What’s the point?” of every scene, description and dialogue and to help me make the story clearer. In my final draft of the novel, I lost half a chapter towards the end of the novel because the critical me didn’t think it fitted and it was simply repetitive. It hurt to lose it, but it was worth it in the end, as I was able to get to the finale quicker and spend more time on those moments. I find this process helps me understand my story better, but, more importantly, it gives me a renewed passion for the writing. I’m no longer fighting with myself, destroying my creative soul over a missing word or punctuation; Creative and Critical Me are working together to make my story better.

While this particular process might not work for you, find a creative process that does and challenges that self-doubt.  Make that Super Critical Self pay for its supper by challenging it to find the solutions, and you will find that it will aid you in crafting your story.

But most importantly, love what you do.

Don’t lose sight of your passion for the creative process, because it’s unique, and the only reason Super Critical Self is whispering in your ear is because of your passion about what you do and your story. You just have to learn to tame it and have it take aim at the piece and not at your sensitive creative soul.

And just keep writing, dammit!

The End and The Beginning

FeaturedThe End and The Beginning

“There is no real ending. It’s just the place where you stop the story.”-Frank Herbert

17 years.  17 years of hard graft and self doubt have brought me to the manuscript you see above you.  I finished my novel.

Well, finished-ish.

I’m not sure if I’ll ever be truly done with this story; it’s been an itch between my shoulder blades since I was in my late 20s and recovering from two manipulative relationships, but I’ve finally decided to give it as an offering to the writing gods.  I’ve sent three plucky (and probably as fat as Samwise Gamgee) copies out into the world to find their way, and they’ve landed in the laps of three reviewers.  For them it’s a non-urgent doing-her-a-favour deal, but for me it’s so much more.  I don’t care if they’re not into the story (erotic horror fantasy isn’t every woman’s buzz), I just want to know if I’m right; that 17 years of life experience and writing practice (oh the drafts!) have imbued the work with a maturity and a strong narrative voice.  When I read it that’s what I see, but hearing it from someone else will give me validation to continue to fight for the right to write.  

Because that’s what all writers do, don’t they?  Fight with every aspect of life to get their story written.  

I know all three have received the manuscripts, because they all sent me a picture of it arriving in the post, probably thinking I’d find this exciting.  The reality is that it’s terrifying, and the idea that someone unconnected to the work will read it and have an opinion.  Writing is such a personal affair;  the author controls the characters, the voice and the narrative.  So if it’s faulty or bad workmanship, then who’s to blame but myself?  And could I handle that?  

They’ve had it for a week now, and I’ve avoided messaging them.  Because a “Hey, how’s things going?” would quickly turn into “What do you think so far?”, “Not started!! Did the front page put you off?”, or even worse, “Is it bad?” 

Of course, the answer won’t probably matter, since the chances of being published are quite slim, but it would be nice to know that my gut feeling about how it flows is how others find it as well. 

But still, have they started it yet?  And what do they think?

One of the reviewers is already talking about passing it onto a friend, who’s apparently “into this stuff.”  I’m ok with that, because they might have specific comments about how it plays out or if it’s too PG for the target audience.  She said that she’d of course read it first, but that’s where the conversation lagged.

Because had she started it yet?  And if so, was the silence embarrassment for me or for this 108,000 tome of salacious horror I’ve produced?  Or both?

I just need to close my eyes, breathe and remember that it’s just a first, and there are so many more to write and refine.  

So I’ve found the place to stop my story, and it’s a real cliffhanger: 

Have you started it yet?  And is it any good?